Bro, you asked a tough question. I don’t know how to answer you. But you are a philanthropic guy. You can go; I mean who else is more benevolent than you who even gives his own future to someone else? Sacrifices his own happiness. Just go for that Ruracio and support the couple.
I hope you are actually better now that you moved on – or so I believe. I expect you to have moved on. But you seem not to have learnt your lessons enough. I even wonder what all that motivation was all bout. All those times we worked on that self-talk in the bathroom mirror and then in the dresser mirror. Why? What were you waiting for?
Correct me if I am wrong, you let a lassie slip through your fingers. Who does that in our decade? I know it’s just last year. But please! You are better than this. All those books on self-esteem, Magic of Thinking Big, The Secret, you even topped it up with enough love and related books that scared the bookstore attendants at Prestige Bookshop, remember when you made me pay for a few of them so that the purchase could pacify your embarrassment? Art of Seduction, Five Languages of Love and Eat – Pray – Love. Wait. Ha ha ha! You actually thought Eat Pray Love was a how to win her heart guide book right? Sorry bro.
Last, I checked, the lady was yours for the taking, she was young, she was smart, she was God-fearing, she had a nice job going and she actually loved you. Like SHE REALLY! REALLY! Loved you. She was dedicated to what you would have led her to. We could all see it in her eyes. But you couldn’t pick out a fish from a herd of sheep my friend. Bro you failed the team. Big-time, why do you think she was all up in your DMs, your texts and her selfies – actually filling your phone, never stopped flowing? Lady came over and saw you first, before her immediate family after her first tour in Somalia. She turned down a chance for a second tour in Wargalo that would have made you two millionaires. Well if you had married her. But now, you haven’t. We actually thought you two would not be seeing each other ever again if she took up the Wargalo tour. she dropped it FOR YOU! All those excuses you gave were meaningless my friend, eh… There is nothing like having a boyfriend, I mean that is not even a legit excuse because you know how you are built. All that field craft? You couldn’t apply it to snatch a lady from right under your nose, and push her to where she belonged? – your side. Kurutu kabisa!
Anyway, you see what happened to you. You are now in regret, you are here breaking your fingers out of the tension of crossing them. Wasted hours. What were you talking about all those hours in those restaurants and picnics you used to go to? What were you actually doing? Planting trees at Karura? Road trips were for what – counting potholes? Then you come here and try to convince me how you did your best and how the other man was more loving than you were and beat you to it? I even doubt she is the one who left…
I was not writing to bash you, but I needed to get some sense into your mind, I needed some venting of my own. You need to be straight up. You need to be more confident with your mind. Your heart gave you a blank cheque but you decided to frame it, wrap it up and put a flower on it and hand it over to your pal – enemy maybe. Well, there it goes on your wall of shame. Next time do not wait for the lady’s proposition my friend. Do not even expect it to be automatic because oh we can all feel the butterflies. Say it like it is. Actually, when you feel those butterflies in your stomach fluttering all over your body and through your heart to your big head, sit her down and tell her like it is. I want you for the rest of life. “Please lady, rear my butterflies”. She will laugh at you for a minute there, but she will see you are serious. If you try acting like Kariyaga Construction and work on that road for a decade, a foreigner will come, and scoop that contract right from under your nose. Including the section of that road, you had constructed.
& for that Ruracio and wedding committee decision you need to make on that invitation, I endorse your participation. Go be part of it. That is who you are. Go crown your generosity brother. You now actually have a chance to finish what you started. Support that man. It is well.