Every year I always set up a writing goal. You know… like what I want to achieve article-wise… the number of articles to churn every week and the like. This year I haven’t. (Drafts Feb 2019). I want to do things differently. Honestly, I have always wanted to do things differently. That difference is what I don’t know. Interesting enough as I am writing this. I have a conviction that I am concentrating too much on cleaning the outside of my cup yet my inside is dirty… The case is how much I have been tying the dysfunction of my writing to the outlook of the blog. I have remodeled this thing almost a thousand times. Yet it’s not about the outlook of the blog but the content. Excuses about not doing what I should be doing. Excuses about not laying out the imperfection for everyone to see. Hmmm… how I have been blaming my writer block (Which is not even a block) on the outlook of my blog. Last year was a busy year. Busy and very fast. And it had great fruits I must admit. (Honestly, I don’t know which year this is we are talking about. I just picked an article draft and decided I’m publishing it.)
While thinking about the course my blog needs to take this year, I decided to take a more open approach. A full testimony kind of approach. I mean… most of my stories on here are true. Some come from some really painful encounters and others from some super happy ones. Every detail I try to put down as vividly as I can remember it. I started another series at some point a few years back but I felt a leading to tell. This story is as-is. You know how you can try to describe a scenario while hiding some details so that you can protect the cast? But then I have been debating within myself and I realize that the process that the Lord was taking me through in that season will be diluted when I try to pacify that story and every other story I write moving forward. There are many ways of taking the glory from God. Also, there are many ways in which we try to play victim even in situations where we shouldn’t be. Another aspect of pride that is rarely seen.
This came after a deep conversation we had with Phyll about how she sets up her stories and testimonies. She told me that she tells the story as it is. No hiding details, no spicing it up, and that kind of thing. At first, I felt like this is too much because I am used to hiding details so that I do not victimize the owners of the stories. coz honestly some of them are really nasty. But along the journey, I have learnt that testimonies are not majorly for entertainment… They are for God’s glory. Moving forward I endeavor to remind myself that I will be sharing these experiences as they occurred.