For a very long time, I continued to attend Catholic Masses, and attending Monday Fellowships at a church in Buruburu. By this time, I never knew much about spiritual growth. However later within the course I came to learn about spiritual growth in depth. I was feeding on Keith Moore’s – Growing Up. The challenge of spiritual immaturity is that quite a lot passes you because of lack of know, little or no wisdom 🤔. You know like how when as a kid everything used to ‘pass’ by you….
For instance, when I was growing up, we had just moved to Kerugoya, we were still using lanterns and I was the only child awake. Cindy a pre-unit pupil was asleep and Claudia was well… Still not in the scene. It was in the evening and I was just seated there watching my parents enjoy their mukimo. I couldn’t handle the entire thing, but there was a way I could eat it and when the going got tough, I could scratch the entire mush and only leave with everything else but the maize. A neighbour of ours who was a trader of sorts happened to pass by. I was not grasping everything they were speaking, I guess I was sleepy or not interested but at some point, the lady removed some steel wool (Old school scouring pad) from her bag and started displaying her product. I think she was displaying the quality of the steel wool. That is pulling at it to show its thickness like how ladies with natural fros disentangle their hair to check how healthy the strands are. After she was done with her display and she left, I saw my father point at his plate and push it away. And so did my mother. I never understood why until years later. It came to my understanding, that while she was busy displaying and demonstrating the strength of her product, she was doing an injustice to my parents meal because she did it on top of their plates of food. As we all know, steel wool fluff is super dangerous if ingested. Any metal that can rust actually. That’s the reason why they put their food away. I had to be intellectually mature to a point to understand why they put those plates away or even join the dots because no one told me why.
It has been the same thing for me on this journey at some point. Like salvation… At some point it was okay for me to say, I am born again, but come Friday I want to hang out in a cigarette smoke clouded joint sipping my bottle of Guinness because one is not sooo baaad… So then, my consumption of Keith Moore’s – Growing Up is being received very differently in 2018 as compared to 2015. I get to understand the word better, some sermons relate stronger than they used to back in the day. That is also how I realised that I need to stop lying to myself. I can go to 50 masses in a week, but I will still not know God the way I seek to know Him as long as someone else is supposedly doing all the eating of the Word, chewing the Word, and praying for me. I had to find a “Bible based church” as contrary to a Doctrine semi-Bible based church. – Note. My testimonies here. (I know this is vague much. But I will get into how I moved from one place of worship to another) Note I didn’t say church. Because church is more than a building ☝️. This is my experience. This is a time when news articles were all about false prophets, con Pastors and miracles on sale, hankies to heaven, designer anointing oil on sale, and holy water on shelves et al! I was lost.
I was very protective with anyone inviting me to their church… Too protective. Why were they trying to “Win me over to their church?”
At this point, I was a lost lamb. I did not have a shepherd. I did not have solid spiritual mentoring. The Mission Supporters League provided that mentoring for me, but only to a point, – the level of student teacher approach. Discipleship classes did me a good one. But I realized it was not enough. It’s like being taught how to fly, getting that CPL or even ATPL but no flying experience at all! I was still a defensive believer and any time anyone started a salvation conversation and mentioned “Catholic Church” or “You Catholics”… I used to zone out and that would be the end of a potentially strong spiritual discussion or bond between us. Where to go? Who to follow? Where to fellowship? Where to grow? How to grow?
2 thoughts on “STEPping Into Salvation II”